There is NO rule or mandate out there in the world that says we have to accept or even listen to, criticism from others. So why does hearing it or reading it cause us so much pain, anger, frustration, fear, and self-doubt?
Is there such a thing as "constructive criticism"?
Criticism: the expression of disapproval of someone or something based on perceived faults or mistakes.
Constructive: serving a useful purpose; tending to build-up.
So, in theory, if someone criticizes us (or expresses disapproval of something we did or our character) it is based on their perception. We all have our own reality and perception - everything in our world is a perception. So who is "right"?
The big question here is...Do you want to be right or happy?
One of my business pillars here at Whispers to Wisdom is knowing who you are, what you want, and why you want it. Until all of that is crystal clear in your mind and vision, you will simply endure criticism, usually from one of two unhealthy views.
My 3 step formula to move past any kind of criticism will help you listen to your own whispers, so that you can get to your own wisdom ...and begin living the live you were meant to live
If we merely accept what is said to us as criticism in order to please others, and we move on and not have it continue to shadow our self-image and ability to grow and live the life of our dreams, it might work. But how often does that happen?
If we argue, defend our position, try to convince or bully someone into our way of thinking, and then forgive and forget and move on with our life, it might work. But how often does that happen?
It's purely an inside job. How to handle criticism and even endure it is simply a choice you have to decide to make. It's simple but not always easy. It is SO worth the effort to learn these 3 steps to deal with criticism and move on with your life. Here is the 3 step process - easy 'peezy, eh? *******************
1. Say a polite thank-you and promise to consider what's been said.
2. When in doubt if it's true or you can't stop thinking about what was said...ask for honest feedback from someone who cares, knows you well, has your best interest at heart, and is a person you trust.
3. Forgive. Anything else is a state of conflict that erases the possibility of your feeling inspired. Forgive anything...What they said, what they did, what they wrote, what they thought, how they misjudged you, their perceptions, opinions, and their ego....all of it - whatever it is that YOU have told yourself. Let it go. If you decide to let the person go out of your life, well, that's your decision. Remember, though, sometimes we get rid of the physical beings in our lives but never remove their presence and after-effects.
You were designed to do great things. You are the only person like you. You have gifts and talents others need. Just Do You and attract the people who get it and get you.
You can forgive and not say a word to the other person.
You can question things your MFTP's (mother, father, teacher, preacher) taught you in the past. You're an adult now. Make your own choices that are right for you right now.
Our reality is what we decide it is.
When you KNOW rather than DOUBT, you'll discover the necessary ability to carry out your purpose.
I'm waiting to hear from you!
Live Your Whispers!